Friday, September 11, 2009

Reflections on arrivals

(View from my seat of the double decker bus)
Arriving at 5am in Mae Sot yesterday I ran through my usual thoughts when I arrive alone in a town I've never been, in a country I do not speak the language, in place where I am warned petty theft is abound, and have men immediately approach me offering their services as a driver:
1 I become aware that I have no idea where I am and am at the complete mercy of whom ever I agree to become a customer of.
2 I place my value to the driver, or unknown figures around, as everything valuable I am traveling. No longer Amy, I am a: laptop-wallet-US passport-camera-cellphone.

In transition with all these items I am hard pressed to find peace. I am constantly re-adjusting, looking at, assuring everything is still in its place. When I meet someone their kind advice to "be careful" traveling , especially alone, strikes horror into my heart: having let go my guard with them they now sadistically say "be careful" having launched unnoticed heist of my valuables. This has never been the case, but I thought this twice while in Mo Chit bus terminal in Bangkok (for 11 hours). Once while meeting a Burmese man who approached me when he saw "The Voice of Hope" the book of interviews with Aung San Suu Kyi and my lungi - a man's bottom in Burma; and a second time of a Thai woman I met in the bathroom who was going home to Chiang Mai.
During this particular trip I was also told to not mention my interest in Burmese issues, especially recongized and non-recognized refugees as the reason for a trip to Mae Sot.
Is all this self-inflicted terror nesseccary or should I allow myself to trust more in possitivity and the amount our thoughts effect situation? During my time as a GC student I do not think I can allow myself to let this guard down, as I do need my laptop, passport, and fluidity of money.
Once I start with my placement I think I can begin to be simply Amy (perhaps student Amy) again.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Notes while reading Refugee Law Reader

In attempting to word my proposal and in hindsight of writing my JRP I realized that I need to clarify my language of migration, forced migration, as well as refugee status factors and International Law usage of refugee versus common usage of the word.

Words that I believe will be important in such – perhaps I should create glossary:

Refugee

Asylum seeker

Economic refugee

Environmental refugee

Forced migrant(tion)

Migrant worker

Exile(d)

Migration

Immigration

Emigration

Third country resettlement

Internally displaced persons

Detention centers

Refugee camps

Settlements

Protracted displacement

In my search for language clarification I began reading: The Refugee Law Reader: Cases, Documents, Materials. http://www.refugeelawreader.org produced by the Hungarian Helsinki Committee copy righted 2002-3. In their introduction they stressed the importance of understanding context in which Refugee Law emerged; vowing on their own page to: introduce major concepts of Regular and Irregular migration; give information of migration historically; convince a magnitude of migration in the beginning of the 21st century; and regional and international standards for status determination. The site listed main debates which I would like to give my initial reactions to better understand my own position.

Main Debates

Is there a human right of freedom to move to another country?

I know this is stated as one of the Articles in the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, a document which I hold in high appreciation and respect – this document is one that influences my self perception as I was born on the 39th anniversary of its adoption in the UN General Assembly each year my question is not what did I do this year it is what have I done for Human Rights this year. The directly relevant articles are 13, 14, and 15. Article 13 states: “(1) Everyone has the right to freedom of movement and residence within the borders of each state; (2) Everyone has the right to leave any country, including his own, and to return to his country”. Article 14 states: “(1) Everyone has the right to seek and to enjoy in other countries asylum from persecution; (2) This right may not be invoked in the case of prosecutions genuinely arising from non-political crimes or from acts contrary to the purposes and principles of the United Nations.” Article 15 states: “(1) Everyone has the right to a nationality; (2) No one shall be arbitrarily deprived of his nationality nor denied the right to change his nationality.” I have included right to and to change a nationality as this is the case of some refugees from Burma. Burma denies they are Burmese citizens and Thailand refuses them Thai citizenship, nationality becomes directly relevant to cases of migration especially for those seeking asylum in the second country as deportation becomes a constant threat.

Do I think it is a right to flee from one country to another? This is difficult, I believe people have to right to flee countries where UDHR specified rights are being denied to them but I recognize that if the second, or third, country does not have adequate resources to handle a refugee population - especially long term refugees like in the case of a the conflicts in Burma which have no change in sight and have already persisted for decades – the rights of asylum seekers might not be protected in the country of refuge either. Many countries are worried of oversaturation of refugees like the US in her reluctance to accept “economic refugees” whose home countries could not fulfill the protection of Article 22 – “everyone, as a member of society, has the right to social security and is entitled to realization, through national effort and international co-operation and in accordance with the organization and resources of each State, of the economic, social and cultural rights indispensable for his dignity and the free development of his personality.” What do you do when there is no alternative to underfunded refugee camps, which if not managed properly severely restrict development of person and deny right to livelihood?

Is migration an asset to, or a burden for, sending and receiving states?

This I do not understand fully yet as I do not understand all complexities of economic systems. Yes, migration brought Albert Einstein to the US but the argument that “regular” and “irregular” persons of migration can add to the overall skill of a workforce will not do much to woo those affected by job losses in struggling economy. Illegal migration keeps costs low for some business men in the US – the fact of which implies denial of Article 23 – “(1) Everyone has the right to work, to free choice of employment, to just and favourable conditions of work and to protection against unemployment; (2) Everyone, without any discrimination, has the right to equal pay for equal work; (3) Everyone who works has the right to just and favourable remuneration ensuring for himself and his family an existence worthy of human dignity, and supplemented, if necessary, by other means of social protection; (4) Everyone has the right to form and to join trade unions for the protection of his interests.” These two arguments are the ones that I have heard for and against receiving migrants. But I believe there are systems - in existence or not – in which even refugees could become an asset and not strictly a burden.

.

What is the relationship between past movements and present migration policies?

I have limited ideas. Surely each nation has rules specific to the situations that they have dealt with -this is linked with the burden/asset question, and the resources of the nation. I will learn of the present migration policies in Thailand, and now seek the influence of past migrations if it is not immediately apparent.

While writing this a manager of the guest house I am staying at came up to an Italian guest and I and began speaking about a DVB program he had just watched about a temple in Mae Sot that ran out of food to give out to Burmese people who had crossed the border on 9-9-09 to receive food from the monastery. He said that many people lost money on the trip, a worker on average gets 4000 kyat as a man per day and 2000 kyat as a woman per day. Then he spoke of his own work permit in Thailand of the validity period I cannot recall exactly what he said either 2 or 10 years cost 2100 baht.

The Refugee Law Reader also included:

Main Points

Unlimited exit v. limited entry rights

Trade-offs between regular and irregular routes

Migration as a pervasive feature of the human experience

I do not yet understand these main points well if at all, but will keep them in mind during my studies. And I certainly agree that migration had been a pervasive feature of human experience, our new borders have made it more difficult this line of argument comes to issues of ownership and governance large topics with a wide range of views. A can of worms better left shut?

Friday, September 4, 2009

Goodbye, Calibri! Hello, Garamond!

The best thing I have done in a long time: change the font of my normal template on Microsoft Word. Reason: the slight, and unhealthy, irritation I used to feel as typing is gone. My documents now are typed in Garamond, which is a relief as I have had great disdain for Calibri but limited action to prevent the horrors of using this font - every thing I typed last year was in Calibri! While I acknowledge the superfluous nature of my font grudge - I am pedantic, I know I cannot be alone in harboring contempt for certain fonts. Or am I?

I especially enjoy the capital j of Garamond, set lower than most characters; and take pleasure each time I sign a document, Amy J!

In other news I am, documentation wise, ready to go to Thailand! My flight is on the 8th of September!

More to come of this adventure as it unfolds. Incase you were wondering: Hong Kong is a beautiful place.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Well,

Dear all:
Sorry. I had plans to post my backlog of interesting writings, while I was in the US. I think that my grand scheme of posting all Comparative Religion and Culture writings (as well as photos since 2008-due for Facebook) will need to be scraped. I am currently in Hong Kong finishing up preparations for my Independent Study Semester - I might enlighten ya'll about this when I know - and visiting Howard. It is likely that that I will not update again for quite sometime: I have many other obligations; however, I do enjoy posting and will attempt to but, can not consider posting an obligation at this point.

Please enjoy the following photos in my absence. They are from Taiwan last year: exhibiting my breakfast consumption.



Thank you,
Amy J

Friday, January 9, 2009

Consciousness as location

My meditation masters this year, Autobiography of a Yogi, Billy Joel lyrics, Manuel (the owner of Empty Space Chiang Mai) all speak to your location being the site of your consciousness. CRC as a group has been berated for spending too much time at home via Facebook, which was a revelation because none of the students would like to consider themselves disconnected from what we are learning and the people we are studying. Our berating did not fall on deaf ears as we have been encouraged to cultivate unity of mind, action and body through meditation.
The Guru of ‘the yogi’ is omnipresent and would choose to stop lessons entirely when his student’s mind is not singularly focused on his message. I wonder what he would do with my monkey mind! As I am currently reading Autobiography, this concept is pervasive in my thought. As I study my mind and my habitual thought patterns I am noticing that these focus more on peoples, I suppose this means that my mental location would be in the spot that I have memories with this person but wouldn’t it be interesting if by thinking of someone I was that person! I don’t have a desire to be anyone else but, I wonder if having my consciousness on a person, I became them if that would mean that I would experience their thoughts, how confusing that would be! Good thing I have only one monkey mind to deal with. I suppose it is also true that I don’t have my entire consciousness on that thought generally I am also present in classes or my location by sensory input etc. so my consciousness is rarely singular, except perhaps when I am alone. There is a Thai saying, “when you are with your friends watch your words, when you are alone watch your thoughts” this is intended to speak to creating negative karma, but this saying has made me realize that being with other people causes my consciousness to be with them, but doesn’t cause my habitual thoughts to cease so it causes a split in my consciousness which is not necessarily true when I am alone. Alone my mind can be entirely focused on my thoughts - if sense input isn’t too distracting - and thus if not checked, entirely with those memories.
I think of the consciousness by location with guilt as my body is obviously in India but I don’t know enough of Indian history, language(s), politics, economic situations, culture, religion, styles, landscape to feel able to have my thought immersed in India. Looks like it is time to read, read, read!

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Arrival

I just arrived in India… about 3 hours ago. I haven’t seen it yet, obviously, but I feel like I have seen so little of India more so tonight than any other arrival into a country. I suppose this is my first time flying in at night time but I also feel that it has to do with the airport. Everyone who had been to India before said that it was not like India - this particular airport was very nice. Perhaps when I say I haven’t seen India it is because I haven’t seen the dirt of India. This is a lot of what people describe India as, they talk about the smells in India, people and animals going every which way, beggars, peddlers, death. As I write this I have the feeling that by coming to India I have given up being comfortable for a while. This feeling goes with my hypothesis that India will not be equipped with the get-everything-you-need-to stores or the over whelming multitude of single purpose stores present in all of the cities I have been in Asia. We will see how true this is, my foresight of cities is never accurate. I am constantly surprised by them: the western shops, tall buildings, relative cleanliness compared to my foggy – and unfounded - images of wooden buildings and dirty roads.
I had two weird experiences in the airport. One: Lizzie and I were the last two passengers on the plane. It took me a while to gather my belongings and when we were leaving the plane, continuing through the passage to airport we were inundated by Indian men in navy blue uniforms and neon yellow vests, some holding vacuums. It was overwhelming. Two: in the bathroom, there was a woman who stood with her mop and bucket (might have been a broom)behind the door. She stared and did not smile, I felt embarrassed yellow-mellowing with the person who cleans the restroom standing in front of me. I went back and flushed. She continued looking ahead, not necessarily fixed on me, as I washed my hands she dispensed some paper towels and handed them to me. Too much service! I am uncomfortable!
Things I knew about India:
The head bobble, my friend Nate’s mannerisms, and discussion with of Indian culture.
Gandhi, the break from England
Yoga autobiography of a yogi
Stories from travelers

Saturday, November 15, 2008

CRC in Thailand= Ants and Dengue Fever

The ants go marching 1 by 1

Hurrah!
Hurrah!

The ants go marching 2 by 2

Hurrah!
Hurrah!

I bite the pancake I just made,
and I find the body of an ant mid-run!
and I find them on my computer,
my bed,
the counter,
my shoes,
the floor,
empty cups.
and when I spill flour they swarm the spot!

There are a lot of ants in Thailand! I can't leave a banana peel out for 30 seconds before it is covered by 100 plus little bodies. The worst part I would say is that they swarm spilled flour, I like to make pancakes a lot and try as I might not to be wasteful, I always spill some. This would be fine if I didn't share a kitchen, I'd let them eat for a while and hope that they left then clean up. But, I share the kitchen with the family who runs the guest house we stay at and I feel that out of respect I must clean up immediately after I finish cooking, this means cleaning up the feast midway. Unfortunately there is no way to scare ants off of food. So, I must use the sponge to wipe up the counters and I always end up having to kill some of the ants. I feel bad, I don't even like to kill mosquitoes. I let them bite me because, hey, they need to live too. I don't know that we should be more concerned with the death of humans than the death of animals, just I like I don't think there should be more media coverage of the deaths of Americans than the Iraqis or the Afghanis that we are bombing. The Museum of World Insects was all about this, it was created by a man who loves and has studied mosquitoes for 50 years. His exhibition is all about respect for all living creatures, I was really moved by it two weeks ago and now, we have two students, one recovering from and one currently being tested for Dengue Fever. Is it insensitive to them if I still advocate not killing mosquitoes?

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Liberation from the Khao San Dreads

At 1:30 this evening I heard a knock upon my door. I made it to the door after de-toping my lap, wondering who it could possibly be and internally apologizing to my roommate who was sleeping. It was Brittany, my former room mate who excitedly came to my room last evening at a similar time when I had been trying to sleep. She was excited again. I'm trying to begin sleeping on a natural sleep schedule so her aperance made me a little frustrated I wanted to tell her that I didn't want her comeing in and joking with me again, I tell her Lizzie is sleeping.

She asks if I can help her with something, "what's up?", with that question her arm rose up and in her hand was the item that told me what was up. A dismembered dreadlock and sissors. I asked her if she was ready for this, my frustration instantly vanishing, when the answer was yes I told her I had to finish my post and that I was ready to help her. I posted, Hybernateded the laptop, grabbed my safty sissors, brushed my teeth, moved my school work from my bed, turned off the lamp and headed for the door. Lizzie said to me "Amy it is 1:30". I knew, but I also knew I had a duty. It was important for me to have Julia with me when I cut off my hair, I knew this was important for Brittany and she needed support. I needed a way to pass on the kindness I was given.

We did it. It was beautiful. We got the before , during and after pictures. There were pep talks and concerns shared. There was laugher and in the end there was a beautiful, sexy, funky young woman with a new banging hair cut! not even a quarter inch in some places - and needing of trimming and restyling in the morning.

Everything was remininscent of when I cut my hair off last year. The laughter, the liberation, the sissors, the location (bathroom), the worries, the sharing of experiences. I really enjoyed it and was glad to be with my friend, glad I hadn't turned the light out earlier, glad I hadn't turned her away before she had a chance to speak and glad - again - for the wonderful (Amazing!) women I have met in Friends Global World.

When I returned to the room I showered. Looking in the mirror when my hair was wetted and no longer covering or framing my face I felt that I was very beautiful. I haven't been feeling beautiful receintly. I've been feeling haggard and homely so it was moving for me, to rediscover my beauty after helping a friend redefine hers.

First day of classes in Chiang Mai.

First day of classes in Chiang Mai:

We had a large packet of reading due for the first seminar in Thailand from Culture Shock: Thailand.
The seminar was started off by a reading which spoke to getting lost in a culture and followed by a 15 min stream of consciousness free-write. The free write was helpful, I have been feeling a bit crazed recently. I've been wondering how I should interact with people and noticing what my habits are. My questions are "Big" so I am lost in the cyclone of voices, of others and myself that dance in my head trying to find "the answer". I accept the concept that there is no answer to this question. But I feel that: yeah okay, there is no one answer but what that means, is that there are many answers and among these answers many subdivisions and branches off of the subdivisions and each of these branches and subdivisions is a street with many 30 floored hotels and every hotel room is another answer. Suddenly I see that each item in a city could be an answer and when you make that leap you might as well take it to the global and the universal level. It is overwhelming. I don't what to change my interactions with people based on their different culture, sex, occupation, age, social standing, language but I do and I also don't start conversation based on all of these things. There are too many possibilities of who I will meet so I base my interactions on what I have read, people I have met before and different messages that have come through "the grapevine" from previous travelers. I would prefer to meet each person without this, but perhaps with my visual vexation I can not help but make assumptions that drive my interactions. I try not to lay myself over what I am being told about another person's life experience but I can't separate myself yet. Maybe motivated by greed: I can make the most of this conversation for my studies, I can learn a lot about where I can travel, they can teach me: ...., I can understand, I, I, I, I, I. Information and interactions are not separate they are what propel me, make me further "enlighten". We were taught at Dharma Drum Mountain that the goal is to prefect ourselves so that we can help others. I want to help others but I can't even answer my own questions. I know that the goal and the starting point are in every moment, and an interaction is not just about me, it can benefit others but I am too insecure with myself to see this during an interaction; which makes me operate for myself (I think).

I don't know... I should accept that. Life is suffering and impermanence so I must accept non-ego. That is what a Monk told me this evening. We had a 2 hour open chat with the monks at a local wat, I also met a monk that wanted to be "gangster" and "punk-rock" but couldn't as a monk. He wanted to meet my brother because they "have the same spirit" and would become friends in 5 minutes. I told him that my brother would love a letter from him and I will bring him the address next week when the wat has the same free talk time. I will write more about the gangster later if I do meet up with him again. He spoke as if he had his own following and way to approach the world and Karma.

Friday, October 31, 2008

Street Dogs

One of the many immediately recognizable differences between Taiwan and Thailand are the Street Dogs .

The first week I was in Taiwan I made a comment to some other students that had studied in China about how Fat the street dogs in Taiwan looked. I walked through the FuRen Campus on one of the first days I was in Taiwan it was also one of the first days that the students were on campus. Everywhere there were groups of students preparing dances for a year opening show, and I saw some students feeding the dogs. This was heartwarming and it reminded me of the street dog that used to run around Zhejiang University campus with clothing and shoes that the students would buy for and put on the dog. The dogs on the Zhejiang Campus were very skinny and mostly small, so I was wowed when I saw the Fat and tall dogs that ran down the streets of Xinzhang. I was told that in Taiwan many people will buy puppies and when they start getting too big, the owners will drive the dog far away from the house, somewhere that the dog can't remember the way home and let it go.

Since arriving in Thailand, to Khao San rd, a major tourist destination of Bangkok I have noticed that that street dogs are skinny when compared to the dogs in Taiwan. Also they strangely are missing large chunks of fur, the only dog in Taiwan I noticed missing hair was missing it in a thin bad around the mouth where it had been muzzled and the skinniest street dog I saw was "Three Socks" a three legged dog that lived near our hostel. The dogs also seem dirtier in Thailand than they were in Taiwan. More to come on the issue of street dogs.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Biddy or not?

Biddy!?




Today I learned a new word. Well, a new slang term. My friend who is in a fraternity mentioned something about how he and his brothers refer to women as "Biddies". In it's most innocent form a biddie is a young, single attractive woman or a way to refer to a friend but it currently connotes a specific social group of women based on appearance. This use leaves no value for these individual women.

It pissed me off that my friend would use this term. Especially when he talks about his fraternity being known as the "gentleman's fraternity" on his campus. This title seems contradictory because of the dangerous effects using a loaded slang term to refer to members of the opposite sex poses. Biddie's etymology and current use is best explained by this definition listed on Urban dictionary (in England Biddy is an old woman):

"Biddy" is actually a very interesting word because it has two separate origins, both fairly well-documented, which is unusual for a slang term. The primary meaning of "biddy" is "chicken," and it first appeared in the early 17th century. The word probably came from the nonsense syllables used to call chickens -- something like "here biddybiddybiddy," I suppose. By the late 18th century "biddy" had been adopted as a derogatory slang term for women, much in the same unfortunate way that "chick" was in the 1960's.
However, "biddy" in this sense might have died a welcome death had it not been for the influx of Irish immigrants into the U.S. in the early 19th century. Young Irish women often had their passage paid by upper-class American families, for whom they would then work as domestic servants while they paid off their debt. The practice was so widespread that such women came to be known as "Biddies," from a shortening of "Bridget," a common Irish women's name. This use of "biddie" reinvigorated the word, and ever since it has been employed by insolent children to torment their elders. [And still is in England]
Sometime in the last 20 years or so, the term was recycled to mean a woman of any age...
From here biddie's meaning continues to change, this first reinvigeration was perhaps when men started referring to attractive women as biddies; women react in two ways (three or four if we count apathy or ignorance) to the use of biddie. Some women have reclaimed the term biddie from the common use which implies shallowness and slutishness, they are in fact proud to be referred to as a biddie and will call their friends biddies. There is one particular facebook group - yo mad biddies - (the creator of this group is male) where men and women bond over the title biddie: the men are in the group to look all the attractive women and the women come to flaunt their beauty and submit photographs of themselves under the title biddie. There are also many facebook groups that are groups of friends who refer to eachother as biddies. There are also a variety of "self-help" facebook groups that detest the people known as biddies. One of these groups is called "Stop the Biddie Revolution!". The description of this groups is (the creator of this group is female):

Biddie: A high maintenance girl who, though reasonably attractive, is usually meant to be a space-filler at parties. She travels in packs of fellow biddies and does not offer social skills or intelligence. Biddies usually keep to their pack of biddies and rarely leave other than to have sex with some guy. They can be seen drinking bud light from a straw so they do not smear their lipgloss. They play beerpong only when shitfaced, and they suck. Often described as a "dumb ass bitch who sometimes sluts around." These girls are usually invited to parties so that the guys at the party can get laid, easily. They wear mostly preppy expensive clothing and Ugg Boots (if you see a girl wearing ugg boots and there is no snow on the ground she is 99% likely to be a biddie). When taken away from the pack one may find the girl is not actually that bitchy, or that slutty, or that dumb, but when in the pack she resorts to group mentality.

LETS BAN TOGETHER AND END BIDDIE-ISM!!! We must stop this now before all girls get a bad rap. If you know someone who is fighting from biddie-ism, or if you are suffering yourself please join this group. If you would rather hang out with girls who actually have a brain rather than a bunch of dumb space fillers join this group.
This particular definition of biddies resonates with the fact that my friend does say that biddies are a large portion of the population attending the fraternity parties on his campus and the other times that he has said that all the women who go to fraternity parties just want to have fun. By "have fun" he means: dancing, drinking and finding some one to hook-up with. This makes me not really optimistic about the potenital effects using the term biddie will have on way that these men will veiw women. For example, my friend considers himself quite worldly but when he speaks about his experiences at fraterntiy parties and talks about the women who attend the parties this it is very obvious that the world he is part of is much smaller than he realizes. Being part of this community has has created a set of terms for him to apply to this very small sampling of the population, but this sample seems to him to be congruent with all women on his campus and most women in America. This is very dangerous, as Stop the Biddie Revolution acknowledges, the context in which a women will be refered to as a biddie is just one portion of this women's life, looking like a "biddie" doesn't reduce the IQ, modivation or the character of a women. This is exactly what lipstick feminism tries to show us, women can symultaniously be smoking hot and highly intellegent. The idea that most women, even on college campuses where this term is most often used, fit the discription of a biddie issued by "Stop the Biddie Revolution" is false. So the use of biddie in this way creates a warped ideal women atleast from the prespective of a non-leg-or-armpit shaving, teeshirt wearing woman that does not want her character to be judged by her appearence (I don't deny the importance of presentablity, but the reality that it comes in many shades and styles).

Using a term that can be applied negatively to a wide variety of people limits the potential for interpersonal relationships. For example, how many times does "Look at those fricken' hippies!" lead to a conversation between the speaker and these hippies? Not very often. Perhaps in situations like these negative words are only used if there is already limited to no intention for an interaction. However, it is when people approach another person or percieved type of person with only negative bias and no hopes for communication that misunderstanding and hatred are bred. This happens between cultures, nations, religions, sexes and it can only lead to further seperation and eventual conflict unless people recongnize what their preconcieved notions are and work to test them. Not every mindful interaction will be positive (all sterotypes have some truth) but they will be more honest and this breaks the idea of a stereotype as a controlling reality. I've seen this in action in Bangkok. I was afraid of comming to Bangkok. I was afriad Bangkok was going to be all prostitution, despiration, sexuality and attempts to swindle the farang. Coming (I've only been near Khao San Road) hasn't changed this but it has made me understand what part these aspects play in daily lives and the economy, or, in other terms: why they are present. This understanding puts me at peace with Bangkok and leaves me wanting to learn more about it. This desire to further understand a person I would hope would be a leading motivation any time a person interacts with another.

I know Biddie is just a silly code name used in a Fraternity and that my friend doesn't used it in it's worst form, but i can see how its use has impacted the way that my friend enteracts with reality and in this way (because is it objectifies, simplifies and reduces the creditablity of women) its use poses a problem. I posted a picture of my self under the title, and question Biddie!? and wrote this long post about what I percevie the potienial dangers of biddie's s use are, because I wonder who I, or any woman becomes when she is viewed only in varrying degrees of biddie-ness.



Appendixes:
Further examples of the horrible uses biddie can have:

1) Another definition from Urban Dictionary:
A dumbass bitch, usually 18 or younger. picture it: short shorts, ugg boots, string straight hair and mad eye makeup for a high school frosh. they go out at night looking for the party so they can get shitty on mikes hard, cheap wine, or other people's alcohol. they have a bun on the top of their head as if they rolled out of bed looking like a pre-pubescent prostitute. being a biddy means being dumb is the cool thing to do.
2) The words that appear as links of ideas associated with "biddy" on Urban Dictionary:
biddy bitty, slut, girl, biddies, biddie, bitch, whore, sex, ho, old, chick, hot, fuck, woman, chill, prep, pensioner, biddy fiddler, head, hot girl, jawn, mamacita, fogie, holla.
3) The discription of "Biddies R' Us" another facebook group founded by a women against biddies:
Biddies are skank ass hos. We are not biddies. We are ANTI-BIDDIES! If you are a biddy and try to join our group we will kick you out!

biddy- bi-dd-ee- (noun.) often times classified as a girl who thinks she is the shit but is in reality just a stupid, little, smut that boys make fun of behind her back as she is sucking their dicks completely oblivious to the fact that she is being used. Often times, "biddies" are found traveling in packs, or groups, wearing tight ass jeans and shirts that expose their often pierced belly buttons. Biddies always wear too much make up and always straighten their hair and put it in weird ponytails, occasionally on the side of their heads. FOr Example-- boy:yo bitch come over here biddy: hahAHhaha like, whhy!? boy: i want my dick sucked, come on its fun Biddy: hahahah like, are you sure its fun boy: yeah trust me biddy: hahaha okay but i need that one beer it takes for me to get retartedly shitfaced first hehe lol


the following is a quote from a grimy guy in 30th street station, "eenie meeney minie mo, catch a biddie by its toe." its just too easy, isnt it?

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Ponderings on Collectiveness

One crisp winter evening during my freshman year in College, I walked about a half mile from my dorm to a hill that rose just over the lights of the campus. The moon was bright and illuminated he snow covered ground. The bite in the air was not unpleasant, it did not cause wind and it prevented clouds from covering the sky, the only variation from black and stars was a halo caused by moisture framing the mostly full moon. I was armed with my film camera and a notebook. I tried to capture the scene (the photographs weren’t every engaging never used them, I think that the negatives now live in a box under my bed) then I wrote. The words flowed out of me, I wrote about the universe and our connection to it, the springs, summers, autumn and winters of a person’s life and all life. I ended without knowing how I began or what I had written other than the last paragraph resounding in my mind. The final question lay in whether humans were like snow, individual flakes that become part of grand and growing snow covering, or whether since we are all born without knowledge each of us has to re-invent the world for ourselves. This excerpt from The Origins of Inequality by Jacques Rousseau delves further into a scenario where we each must learn the world.

Let us conclude then that man in a state of nature, wandering up and down the forests, without industry, without speech, and without home, an equal stranger to war and to all ties, neither standing in need of his fellow-creatures nor having any desire to hurt them, and perhaps even not distinguishing them one from another; let us conclude that, being self-sufficient and subject to so few passions, he could have no feelings or knowledge but such as befitted his situation; that he felt only his actual necessities, and disregarded everything he did not think himself immediately concerned to notice, and that his understanding made no greater progress than his vanity. If by accident he made any discovery, he was the less able to communicate it to others, as he did not know even his own children. Every art would necessarily perish with its inventor, where there was no kind of education among men, and generations succeeded generations without the least advance; when, all setting out from the same point, centuries must have elapsed in the barbarism of the first ages; when the race was already old, and man remained a child.

Teachers, parents, friends, books and all of our experiences create our personal worlds, it is also their existence that allows for men to not to remain children. In our seminar classes we often talk about Chinese/Eastern societies as collective and Western societies, specifically America as not. However, the simple fact that I have a language to that I can communicate with, a language that was given, and taught to me implies that society is by definition collective.

Every individual creates their own world based on their experiences, if we imagine our worlds as circles of Venn Diagrams, there must be a part that can overlap with any other person we meet, people from our home culture we might have a larger overlapping point initially but upon inspection we may find we have similar ideas to individuals all over the world. The point my classmates are making is that, current Chinese culture is born out of two teachings that would say individuals have large common areas, Confucianism and Communism. Confucianism which gives a system in which people in a society should interact with each other, if you apply the Venn Diagram visual to Confucianism you would say the teachings designate points that circles overlap with others in a society, and the designated points might incorporate more area intrinsically than if you tried getting to know someone and discovering commonalities. Your circle might overlap more with your mother based on Confucius’ teachings than if you tried overlapping only where interests were shared. The idea of communism in our diagram example would hypothetically combine every person’s circle into one.

I would say that I assume overlap with individuals I do not know based on how compelled I would be to help them if I knew how, there is no one I would not help the same is true for my friends. Following this example I assume a commonality between myself and others so I was offended by the statement that American society is not collective. I have found some truth in the statement for example: I am studying what I want to(the definition of a Friends Global World education) because I can, as opposed to my Chinese friend who is triple majoring and studying economics so he can be assured a good job, and will be able to support his family. On a material level, since China is not on a rationing system anymore, families in both countries still purchase food together but everything else varies case to case (as does the example of food).

I think it is up to the individual how to how many people and in what circumstances they incorporate others into their world. Right now, I am trying to incorporate too many ideas to attempt to make any solid arguments so I am stepping away. I would like to continue with the visual of the Venn Diagram to show relationships, between, people, societies etc perhaps do this in each country we visit, and separately discuss compassion for others and what the religious traditions describe compassion as. I have learned by flushing these ideas out that that I understand compassion as making someone/something part of your collective.

Monday, October 13, 2008

NYS Absentee Ballot!

This evening I returned to room 205 of Tomorrow's Star after: attending a Qigong class, being held captive at a local Tudi Gong temple and made to watch incomprehensible Taiwanese opera while sucking on a milk candy a sweet silver-toothed Ayi gave me, eating dinner at "the cheap place", and purchasing glue to fix my badangle as well as a really cool eraser. When my eye beheld an AWESOME sight!

My New York State Absentee Ballot!!!!

I have done my best to recreate the wondrous event with writing enhanced by photographs:
I walked across room 205, past my roommate's bed, desk, and dresser. Glancing at our mirror before focusing my eyes on my desk. I saw something strange, an envelope. Who would be sending me mail? Conclusion: No one. It wasn't very long before I recognized the red squiggles above the address as the "Official Election Mail" logo that appeared on my absentee ballot registration form! During the afternoon's excursion I pondered when my ballot might arrive, tentatively concluding that the ballot would arrive after we left Taiwan.
My mother had informed me that someone from the voter's registration office had contacted her stating that the office intended to send the ballot to my home - as that was the only place they were allowed to - despite my request for the ballot to be mailed to Tomorrow's Star. I heard reports of the ballot's printing, but assumed it would take days for the ballot to arrive at my house, days for my mother to bring it to the mailbox and weeks for it to arrive in Taiwan. So, I was hopeful but not optimistic that it would arrive prior to our departure. Consequently this was my reaction:

(For the visually illiterate that is me saying "Yeah!!" not just making a pig nose.) In my ecstatic state I opened the envelope, hardly allowing a moment to breathe from the time that I sighted the red-squiggled envelope to the time that I was dumbstruck by its contents.





Hence, the face of horror.




Luckily all of the physical contents of the envelope, how to vote, and how to submit the ballot were well explained. Unfortunately, while I have my mind made up on the presidential election, I have 5 other things to vote for that I am not even moderately knowledgeable about.

I thought this voting thing was going to be easy. I recounted my ballot receiving experience to my teacher who accurately summed up my feelings: "Yeah, we think we are concerned citizens then it comes to a simple thing like voting..." I certainly have some research to do before casting this bad-boy. While the major party candidates - the de facto bipartisanship of American politics does not tickle my fancy; however, I recognize it is a present reality - appear in more than one place in the voting booths as they do on my ballot? This seems strange, wouldn't it increase the likely hood of a miscount?

I don't know; but, I do know my badangle is back and the weather in Taiwan the past two days has been just as fantastic as the New York autumn I have been homesick for.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Push Harder

I resolved to challenge myself this year to set and follow goals, setting goals being nothing new, accomplishing them being so. I know/knew it would be hard, for a reforming slacker, someone who can accomplish greatness, but falls short of finishing academic projects within the assigned time frame to the level they have been envisioned.

Reforming from being a total slacker, especially academically, is a bit like learning to crawl. My goals have to start small, pushing up to my hands first and dragging my legs before learning to synergize my motor functions. We are currently in the middle of the session in Taiwan and, I’m not on track to finish my studies at the standard I impose upon myself. Three weeks in, and I have already noticed a decline in my motivation. It is a self initiated decline in motivation, as it always is, but this time I have sabotaged myself in a much more diabolical way than my standard procrastination. No, this time afraid of all that lies ahead of me and the fact that I am capable of actualizing my vague and idealistic goals for a life of informed social action has caused me to throw in an anchor that has wrenched my legs out from underneath me; leaving them dragging as a struggle to crawl forward. This anchor was thrown out of fear of failure, fear of the unknown, fear of inadequacy, fear of irrevocable uprooting.

I am in the business of studying religion, something that grounds people, while and by studying religion I am being forced to reflect upon myself. When I look towards my grounding I don’t see anything coherent, this is what I wanted, I wanted to bulldoze what I knew and build upon the rubble through my experience in Friends Global World (as well as rely on myself and break my slacking tendencies) but it scares me. I have taken on full responsibility for myself, destructing old habits, and coming out from under my shelter to receive honest criticism from others to help me achieve the potential I see within myself.

In my fear I have tried to rekindle an old relationship, an option that has been available for some time now, which has remained dormant in a friendship. I have continually snubbed the idea of a relationship as I thought that our differences would prohibit me from venturing and creating the life I want. I recognized recently that this person has been more influential than most in creating a vehicle for me to reach my potential and that this is an important quality for a relationship. This realization in conjunction with my desire to feel grounded is what lead me pursue the relationship again. Luckily I was denied, it stung, but I realize that knowing the extra time I would have to put into a relationship and the comfort that is added by having one would be added weight and would make it harder for my arms to drag me as I work towards perfected locomotion. It is not practical at this moment and I have to be prepared to meet new things as I move ahead. I am thankful that I have a friend who, whether it was his intention or not, knows me well enough to stop me from throwing in the anchor.

Monday, September 22, 2008

Women

This evening I was overcome with a deep sense of appreciation for the unique opportunity I have this year to study and live with a group of such beautiful, strong, funny, intelligent, caring and talented women. When I hear about interesting activities, studies, travels etc of other women I immediately begin finding something in my life that I think is on par with this, or if I find nothing become jealous and outwardly respond excitedly but truly am belittling it in my mind. This is something I am not proud of, and I have been struggling to constantly remind myself that life is not a competition and that I can learn much more from other women if I take my self-halo off.

Friends Global World Program from what I have seen is predominately women, as is our Comparative Religion and Culture group this year. They are not the glitzy, fashion girls I walk past on the street and generally (as well as sadly) discount as decent human beings, no more than a pretty face – a theory that has constantly been disproven but never modified effectively. The Friends Global World breed are compassionate, hard working (when push comes to shove), do it for themselves women who usually excel in some art form or another, qualities I consider to be the most important within myself, and for a woman/kick-ass person to posses. It is proving to be difficult to reeducate my ego that became so active during high school where I felt most of the women in my peer group were petty. Reeducate it, to understand and accept that I am part of group of women who have chosen to dedicate their educational career to being compassionate global citizens. Every one of them just as, or more phenomenal than I and if they are more phenomenal then I (it is generally the case that we each have a place where we excel) they have been great resources that I anticipate will help me now and in the future. More importantly they have answered my hopes that women would make a better showing for themselves.

I think this overwhelming appreciation means I have begun to actuate my desire to allow myself to become a giving and receiving part of this community of women and set aside my hereby useless self-glorification.